Out of the Silence

I am on a retreat in Springwater New York, this weekend. It’s spring and it all seems to be like a Terrence Mallick movie. I’ve been listening to people’s stories at the group dialogue session they hold here and there often seems to be an aspect of “I could have done it better”. Im not convinced that it is  possible;  to be other than what we are. The thought “I should have” serves to perpertuate non acceptance of what we are. We all have limitations as humans. I have  found it more helpful to contemplate acceptance of  that imperfection that I have been conditioned to be. And yes I am searching, but not for perfection or some blissfully utopian being. More for my lost humanity; compassion and humility that seems to have fallen away in the ongoing development of my selfhood. It can be realized at points often the awareness of it arising in silence.

5 thoughts on “Out of the Silence

  1. I like to think in terms of output being determined by input. We all do the best we are capable of with the resources, information and wisdom we possess at the time, thus regrets about having not done as well as we would have liked are inappropriate and take our focus away from where it is most useful, which is learning, so that our future behaviour, aided by this new input, can be more in line with what will cause ourselves and those around us to thrive. Our past mistakes are a treasure trove to value, because we can learn so much from them, and who regrets acquiring treasure.

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    1. Yes no doubt about that for me. Even in terms of what changes are required, in terms of living in a more ecological and holistic way, we can only give based on what we are. For me, I wonder what role awareness plays in all of this and if an aware individual can influence the awareness of others. Not in a will full intent way as it seems to me that This act of intention to change another may not involve awareness.


      1. I think that people who are honest in their speech and have a sense of inner calm have a reassuring effect on others which can draw the tension out of a group. I like what Keith Johnstone says :

        “Students need a ‘guru’ who ‘gives permission’ to allow forbidden thoughts into their consciousness. A ‘guru’ doesn’t necessarily teach at all. Some remain speechless for years, others communicate very cryptically. All reassure by example. They are people who have been into the forbidden areas and who have survived unscathed. I react playfully with my students, while showing them that there are just as many dead nuns and chocolate scorpions inside my head as there are in anybody’s, yet I interact very smoothly and sanely.” ‘Impro : Improvisation and the Theatre’

        I think an analogy which might work when considering the major problems we face in the world is that of those individuals who don’t panic in a disaster. These individuals, who respond confidently and decisively, can bring order out of chaos, attracting the energy of those who would otherwise panic into useful activity.

        And I think this also is true when it comes to clear and rational holistic thinking, which can heal the conflicts of society. The psychologist Jordan Peterson talks about the “logos” – the sacred ability of the word to bring order out of chaos :

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