Rodney Smith writes that “we are immediately confronted by the conditioned tendencies that have unconsciously driven our life. Our history, with its expectations and fears, is embedded within these conditions. These tendencies contain our preset ways of relating to this moment and cannot be perceived as long as we are unconsciously acting from them. These unconscious patterns assure that our present actions will be based upon our history and that we will endlessly repeat this conditioning into the future. Every unconscious action strengthens our preconceived view of the world and assures our reactions within that view.”
What is it “to be” in this universe without the influence and interference of all that we have become? How can we know for sure that what we so vigorously perceive and assume to be true is in fact so? What can we know of our origins that might be beyond what we have become? Does our learning (conditioning) as children defer from “being” or does it add to the experience and does a reconnection with that experience of being enable us in a way that may not be realized through conventional ways of understanding.
For the most part of my life I have been at the mercy of what I was raught and what I learned. I owned no other tool that I knew of. I now question how much one can know of an authentic experience of being through this process of becoming conditioned as a human being.
I am quite sure that this question of direct experience of being can not be known through conventional means. Turning towards a more meditative and contemplative life has helped me to relax my learned responses and assumptions about life and existence. What I know of “being” I experience through attending in direct awareness. I realize that I must return to my acquired conventions in order to communicate the experience, however it is that ” being” is not definable through the use of those tools that humans typically define things and as well find meaning and negotiate our every day life.