It is my experience that there is an inextinguishable longing and search to replace something which has been lost in the development of the conditioned self, however conscious or not I am of it at times. Connected to that there is as well a perpetual flurry of ongoing thinking and activity, focused on relieving this sense of loss or separation, none of which ultimately seems to work.
Through an act of grace I have had the good fortune to come to see that this conditioned self that I have come to identify with includes a barrier, whereby the essence of what I am has become hidden. The reason for the existence of all of this I do not know although I have no doubt that it must serve some evolutionary purpose, all be it unclear what that is. I have only now come to realize that through awareness I can move out from the veil of my conditioning to realize a place of whole and authentic being. That seems to be a more desirable place to be in terms of appreciating and the living and loving of life.
