A Shifting Allegiance

Through taking the time in life to be fully present comes an awareness that  influences my ways in a more gratifying way than I have known.  In  my  attachment to the notion that belief and thought will provide what I need I am lost in fact I now realize that I know nothing. I never really did. My search for the ultimate beliefs and ideals only perpetuated a futile search. They  no longer play a significant role in determining what I do and  how I live. It is not that I actively choose not to follow  scientific, religious or  cultural teaching. It is that in presence I am more aware of the relative nature of the truth of that kind of knowledge.  I am more  deeply aware  of being;  something more about life than my  past conditioned ways  paid attention to,  that emerges through a more unconventional attending to what is.

I no longer need affirmation from others or from adhering to ethical and cultural norms and standards or other outside sources. In presence the energy that fills me in being present here and now is an unprecedented  affirmation of life. It allows for more space for compassion and acceptance and when there is an upsetting experience there is more possibility to be fully present to it and to move through it in the realization that it or nothing else is permanent.  There have been heavy consequences for human kinds obsession with finding comfort at the expense of avoiding what is. A very natural process is interrupted in this shift. I have been an inseparable  part of all the conflict and confusion and have needed to find my way through the neurosis and knots that have been created by it.

There is now, for me,  more of an investment in process as opposed to substance and with that there is more connection to an  energy filled with life, that is life itself.   We are all ultimately a part of  this  however it is that we act in ways that alienate ourselves from it. There is so much more to be known and attended to in this presence. What we need arises out of this attending and is not a mechanical, fragmented and speculative effort of a mind separated from its source. It fills the experience of  perception  with vitality and life. It is that.

It’s not that the mind can ever be separated from its source but  more that the mind has come to believe in its own ability, cut off from fundamental influences,  that are not so easily recognizable by it; never the less that are essential to its existence and functioning. Many an error and horror of human speculation and judgement has  been the product of this separation that has been initiated in the name of human advancement and progress.

To address this in oneself  it is  matter of  a learning that brings one to  the realisation that the mind is not a power on to itself. In believing so we disregard  much of us that is human and that which is eternal.  Collectively we have not come to this realisation and because of this there is a fragmented awareness that has led to a looming global  crisis.

3 thoughts on “A Shifting Allegiance

  1. “There is so much more to be known and attended to in this presence. What we need arises out of this attending and is not a mechanical, fragmented and speculative effort of a mind separated from its source. It fills the experience of perception with vitality and life. It is that.”

    Very beautifully expressed Gord.


  2. Thanks Hariod. The best thing about it is that I am living this as I know you are as well. I am negotiating whatever comes my way with open arms absent of fear and of longing for something better. I wonder though. It has not occurred over night. Is it possible for others to experience these changes in a more immediate way. I think that my own conditioning was rather heavy and required patience. My wife sends an early Merry Christmas to you


    1. I know that some people get what we’re talking about in little more than a finger snap; though that is extremely rare. For myself, it was a long road, though I would not say a particularly hard one – thank goodness!

      Please send my thanks to Iris for her seasonal greetings; and do please let her know that I have fully explored her section of this site and very much enjoyed doing so – I believe I left several comments along the way.

      My regards to you both.



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